


The Queen Bee of Egoton

by Inkribbon796



Series: Masks and Maladies [134]
Category: Jacksepticeye Power Hour (Web Series), Markiplier TV (Web Series), Sanders Sides (Web Series), Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series)
Genre: Casual Murder, F/M, Fem!Dark, Footnotes, M/M, Magic, red soul Dark, some fun stuff after the angst I’ve done with the card deck, superhero au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-19 06:41:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29995425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkribbon796/pseuds/Inkribbon796
Summary: The Entity and Damien would like to formally introduce to the city: Mz. Hyde.
Relationships: Celine | The Seer/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel, Darkiplier/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel
Series: Masks and Maladies [134]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1538131
Kudos: 8





	The Queen Bee of Egoton

**Author's Note:**

> Mz. Hyde by Halestorm is a perfect theme for this AU’s Celine.

Dark was tired, or rather his blue soul was tired. Exhausted and drained not physically or in terms of aura depletion, but mentally. Between Lunky, Illinois’s upcoming wedding, and the fact that Damien was mayor and had responsibilities to tend to; his blue soul was at the end of his rope.

Dark tried for a while to prod him into compliance, he wanted to be mayor, he wanted to make their life difficult. But the soul was at the end of his strength. So Dark’s red soul, ever the overprotective sister, stepped up.

Dark was drinking coffee when the switch happened, hunkered over an entire pot of coffee.

He breathed out.

And then she breathed in.

Illinois watched the switch happen, “안녕 어머니.” [1]

She smiled and stood up, mentally in a much better mood than just a few seconds ago. Dark walked around the table and gave a quick, “안녕” [2] back at Illinois. She set a hand on his shoulder before heading to her office.

Anyone in the warehouse under the age of forty had a look of confusion on their face when they saw Dark. The older, more experienced network members knew better and instantly parted for her.

Due to trying to raise six kids in secret and wanting to become mayor, Dark had always been secretive about Celine but it hadn’t always been that way.

When Dark had first been making moves in Egoton in the 50’s, before his blue had started pulling himself back together, Dark had been wearing Celine’s face. Back in the 80’s Dark had been forced to take her guise again when the city tried desperately to push back against her and her network.

Dark’s blue soul had the head for politics, but the soft stomach of a family man. Wilford this, the kids that. And while such thoughts amused and delighted Dark, her red soul was far more ruthless. More willing to snap necks and end lives  _ before _ they became problems.

The Entity always believed that Celine was truly wasted as a housewife. It had been an insult to her that the world saw fit to hand her Marc as if he had been her only option.

In the hallway, Dark passed Ed who immediately stood at attention and took off his hat, “Ma’am.”

“Send Google to my office, I have some business to discuss with him,” Dark ordered.

“Right away ma’am,” Ed told her and instantly he shot off. She didn’t see him for the rest of the day, which worked out perfectly for the both of them.

Dark’s meeting with Google was short and productive. Google was — if she was being charitable she would call it excited — eager to do whatever she wanted, mostly knowing that the day would end with Google’s hands wrapped around a lifeless throat and Darl not even pretending to be upset.

Somehow Wil heard Dark had switched faces and immediately dropped whatever he was doing to hanging around her. He arrived just as her meeting with Google was concluding.

Regardless of how many times he saw her, he treated her with that same nervousness as the first time. He would loiter just outside the room, clearly expecting to be told to get away from her but wanting to get closer all the same.

As if he still faintly remembered some argument between himself and Dark’s red soul before everything around them fell apart.

“Hello, Wil,” Dark smiled. “How long have you been there?”

Google rolled his eyes as Wil came in, his confidence tripling as he set his elbows on the desk and perched his chin on his palm.

“Hi,” Wil greeted, a huge lovestruck smile on his face.

“Hello,” Dark smiled.

Wil was just staring at her, “You look positively divine.”

Dark’s red soul was glad that her blue soul was so exhausted and out of it couldn’t hear the remark, he tended to get a little put out by Wil’s attention going elsewhere.

“Aren’t you a sweetheart,” Dark smiled as she cupped the bottom of his face and the mad reporter all but melted at her touch. “I have another meeting after this, it’ll be dreadfully boring for you.”

“Not if you’re there,” Wil promised.

Dark let out a haughty chuckle, just taking a couple moments to absorb the wonderful warmth that naturally came from Wil’s body. “If you insist.”

“Google,” Dark commented. “Your presence in the meeting is encouraged but not necessary.”

The android thought on that for a few seconds, “I’ll send Green, while it is rare for you to wear this visage and I like to tabulate new data. However your . . . displays are rather unnecessary for my files.”

“I love her,” Wilford proclaimed as he rested his check on her head.

“I have documented such an assertion before,” Google dismissed. “It is unnecessary.”

“Of course it’s necessary,” Wil gasped, clearly affronted by Google’s dismissive tone. “She needs to know.”

“Which is exactly why I will be sending Green,” Google dismissed, looking at Dark, waiting for her to dismiss or approve of his suggestion.

“Of course, we’ll be in the third meeting room when you’re ready just tell him to come in,” Dark ordered.

With that Google left and Wil kissed the top of Dark’s head ever so gently. Their eyes met and Wil leaned in for another kiss.

When Dark and Wil eventually left their office they headed over to the meeting room, taking Illinois and Yan with them. Illinois because Dark liked to have his input on things, and Yan because the instant she saw Dark she got excited.

Slowly the room began to fill and the various people that entered ranged from lobbyists to businessmen.

Two of the older gentlemen that had survived Dark’s first rampage through Egoton looked especially cowed by the sight of her. Their fear was so sweet in the air to the demon.

A fear that became even more potent by the fact that Green was just standing in the room, clearly waiting for a command or for something interesting to happen.

Discussions kept happening and to Dark’s immense joy, one of the younger businessmen spoke up.

“This is ridiculous,” the man spoke up, too brave for his own good. “You can’t expect us to keep agreeing to these ridiculous demands.”

“You’re certainly a new face,” Dark remarked.

“My father retired last week,” he commented.

“Congratulations on the promotion then,” Dark smiled. She still hated insubordination, red soul or blue, but with the heroes being so bold she needed to make a statement.

Predictably he got angry, “He wouldn’t have needed to if not for you. Or at least the other you.”

__ _ He dies. _ The Entity decided.

__ _ Slowly. _ The red soul agreed.

“I don’t think I like your tone,” Celine warned.

“I’m not going to bow to someone like you just because my father was too busy being your side bitch,” he spat.

Everyone else in the room froze, staring at him in a mix of horror and shock.

“Man, you picked one shitty hill to die on,” Illinois chuckled uneasily, glancing at his adopted mother.

Dark’s aura was moving but Wil was faster, appearing behind the man and slamming his head into the table.

“How dare you!” Wil roared with a ferocity that Dark had not heard in ages. Not since Wil had been known as the Colonel. “How dare you speak to her that way!”

The man groaned, coughing up blood out of his mouth as Wil held him by the hair. The other humans in the room scrambled to get away from him. Illinois and Yan even looked surprised at the ferocity.

Dark was the only one not surprised at the sudden violence.

“So rough, Wil,” Dark was almost purring, seated in her chair like it was a throne. “He should at least get a chance to say he’s sorry.”

The man let out a pitiful gurgle and Dark with saccharine sympathy tutted and stood up, walking over. People moved out of her way.

Wilford silently held the man up and the human was so dazed and in shock that he couldn’t speak. But to Dark’s ears it sounded like the sweet melody of begging.

“I believe you,” Celine smiled, and then an axe appeared in her hands and she plunged it into his chest. Blood splattering her face. She pulled the axe back and swept her hair out of the way.

“Wilford, could you be a dear and take out the trash,” Dark looked at him. “Ask if Junior wants him.”

With a little bit of aura her axe disappeared with a twirl and the blood disappeared. Wil gave her a quick peck on the cheek before he disappeared from the room with the body.

The rest of the meeting went predictably smoothly, even more so after Wilford returned. He was still spattered with blood.

Dark’s red soul was still out for blood, and Dark was more than a bit eager to play around with the heroes.

So Dark surveyed her city with Wil. To Dark’s immense joy the first heroes she found was a patrol trio. Marvin and Roman were with Silver and when Dark slipped out of a portal they looked a bit surprised.

“Celine?” Marvin recognized, realizing just how inhumane and malicious the look in Dark’s eyes were. Dark usually radiated a smug and self important air, but with her red soul in the hot seat after so long Dark was thirsty for some death and revenge. The heroes had stolen her children and they would have to pay.

Dark threw her axe at Marvin first. Roman jumped in front, quickly summoning his shield, which took the hit directly.

“Alright let’s—” Silver tried to fly over and knock Dark away but Wil grabbed him by his cape and with assistance from his aura, flung Silver away. He didn’t toss him very far but Silver was surprised by the sudden attack.

Wilford immediately took out his revolver and started shooting at Silver.

“You heroes,” Dark summoned the axe back, making the shield fly out of Roman’s hand, and was tossed to the side with a massive hole in it, “have been a thorn in my side for too long.”

Roman summoned another shield and braced and Marvin began to magically cast his own shield.

Then a tear in reality violently ripped open and the Host stood in-between Dark and Roman.

“Out of my way,” Dark ordered.

“No, the Host will not,” the Host stood his ground and with a few words and a snap of his fingers, Dark was back in her office with Wil, Illinois, and Yan; and the Host was in the plaza with the heroes.

Dark was pissed but the Host ensured she would not find heroes to attack while in her current murderous mood.

“Who the frick-frack was that?” Roman demanded.

“The Entity’s blue soul is taking a short rest, if the heroes go to city hall they will find that the mayor has inexplicably taken a vacation.” The Host sighed. “Dark’s red soul’s bloodlust will subside but for now the Host wanted to step in to avoid unnecessary death.”

“Dark’s never been that cold and efficient,” Silver commented. “At least not with Wil nearby.”

“That is because they have dealt with the Entity’s blue soul for years, the Dr. Jekyll to Dark’s red soul,” the Host remarked.

“Are yeh shittin’ me?” [3] Marvin commented. “Yah mean that fooker was the good twin?” [4]

“The Entity does not have a  _ quote-unquote “good twin”, _ it is just that the Entity’s blue soul has a much mellower disposition.” The Host said.

“That’s fucked,” Silver groaned. “Why did she attack us then?”

“On part bloodlust, another part parental overprotection,” Host answered. “In any case, the heroes should avoid Dark for the next week. It has been a while since her red soul was able to take advantage of Egoton.”

“Well, thanks for the save then,” Silver told Host.

“It was no trouble for the Host,” the Host smiled and then portaled himself into Dark’s office to have a chat with her and Wil, mostly to calm her bruised ego.

The rest of the heroes went back to patrolling the city. A city that was on a collision course with something dangerous.

**Author's Note:**

> Accessibility Translations  
> 1\. “Morning, mom.” in Korean, informal.  
> 2\. “Morning” in Korean, used informally.  
> 3\. Are you shitting me?  
> 4\. You mean that fucker was the good twin?


End file.
